Damn it! She took the first left on memory lane again!!

For those of you fortunate to still in the dating game, you can relate to the turbulent continuity or rough transition that bridges the gap between one botched relationship and the next. It is in the simplistic nature of all men, to travel light from one to the next, to savour the sweet and salute the sour goodbye, at least theoretically. Practically, clean breaks from the past are a far cry from the reality of women scorned and hearts torn, and of course the occasional illegitimate child, all of which, save for childbirth, any real man worth his salt would be capable of handling. Women, on the other hand, shuffle from one relationship to the next with the burden of past experience resting squarely on their not so broad shoulders. It is unfair, not to mention extremely difficult to put your best foot forward in a relationship when you are always being compared to your predecessor. Being accused of crimes you didn’t commit and anniversaries you haven’t yet missed is just ridiculous.
It is understandable, and in my opinion good practice for a woman to set certain standards as far as male company goes, it weeds out losers and puts that little extra thrill in the chase. However, it does not make sense for a woman, having made her choice, to turn around and blame the poor lad for the mistakes of her ex. In a time where relationships are beginning to accommodate professional ethics, a bare minimum of ‘benefit of doubt’ should not be too much to ask for. Women who stay tethered to past relationships leave even men with the best intentions slaving hard for credibility they already merit. It is cruel that they should have to spend every dying minute proving that they do not have the flaws you expected of them.
You probably were hurt, you probably were treated badly, you probably were in pain, but for heavens sake forget who hurt you and remember that it has absolutely nothing to do with person who now, like your ex, refuses to let you read his text messages or answer his phone calls. It isn’t that he has something to hide; it is that he expects you to have no reason to want to seek. A little trust and blind love within the confines of sound reason can go a long way towards easing the strain on a relationship, all it takes is an appreciation and preparation for the worst possible outcome. I mean, why pick a fight when there is none to be had? Is it so hard to believe that some people are just different? Different was perhaps the reason you ventured there in the first place. Furthermore, it pays poor tribute to your own qualities the minute you take that first left on memory lane and drive down the boulevard of broken dreams every you time you so much as suspect a hair out of place. Every man deserves a fair trial.
Having to anticipate your mans' every move and find fault where none exists is tantamount to paranoia. Benefit of hindsight and chronically raised suspicion is what some may argue constitutes a solid defense for a heart broken one to many times, but if I may be allowed a word of advice; you are better off having a good offence. So instead of having to read into your mans’ every move, why not try and be his every move.